November already!

It's hard to believe that it is November already! Things are busy as usual, I have been subbing day to day and trying to make it to the gym every weekday which can be a challenge. Things for the wedding are moving along, I have gotten accessories ordered and have set up a lot of appointments with vendors for when I am home later this month. We have a caterer chosen, just need to sign the contract. By the end of the month I should have a photographer, florist and a baker! Things are finally going to be coming together and I can check off some of the damn boxes on my theknot.com to do list!
I have started my holiday shopping already just so I can get it out of the way. I'm also thinking about starting my xmas cards. The more I do now, the less I will stress later is what I am thinking. That is my thinking for the wedding as well. Yes I know certain things can't be done until certain dates, but other things can get done, that way they are all ready to go. Well that is my blabbering on for now!

Something Accomplished!

We mailed out our save the dates today! I'm so happy something is finally done! Too bad there is so much left to do for the wedding. Hopefully by the end of next week I will have a caterer and then by the end of next month I should have all the over vendors lined up! I want to order my tiara soon but Adam said I can't wear it around the house since it is part of my outfit, I'm not sure what to think of that. I think a girl should be able to feel like a princess whenever she wants!

On the career front, Adam is still awaiting orders, it has been over a month since he was accepted by the program but the paperwork seems to take awhile. I think it is crazy how much money the military wastes by it's communication problems! It's sad to see how our tax dollars are really being used. In regards to myself, I'm still subbing in the resource position for another week and have getting the following week booked up! I'm glad I'm such a popular substitute, if only I could have my own classroom!!! I hate getting attached to children that I don't get to work with constantly =(

Lots to do

Ok, so Baltimore was fun and I really enjoyed meeting Adam's friends from long ago. Found out however that white wine can make you really sick if you drink too much of it! Who knew? Flying out the very next day was no fun for my hangover as well as the whole lack of sleep thing. I started a long term sub job that Monday as a special education resource specialist which will last the whole month of October. Basically I am pushing into general education classes to give support to students who receive resource. It has been a very interesting experience to see how other teachers run their classrooms as well as the challenges they face with inclusion and mainstreaming. Still wishing for my own classroom someday!
On another note, my save the dates for the wedding have arrived and I am on my way to addressing all the envelopes and getting them out in the mail hopefully soon! I still don't have a caterer confirmed but am hoping that by the end of November I will have all major vendors in place!
We are also in the process of getting ready for my parents visit on Thursday, my birthday and of course Halloween. I love Halloween because of candy and scaring children! We are making a graveyard in the front of the house and have put of lights and my giant spider already! Well I am off to bed!

Update

Ok, so I am back at work as a substitute. No luck finding my own classroom so far and I am losing hope as it gets to further into the year. It might be a good thing though since I am in the middle of planning a wedding and all. Also, that means we can go on a honeymoon right after the wedding so that is what I am hoping for. I have less than 8 months left until the wedding and I already feel like it has taken over my life. Who knew there was so much to do, think about and coordinate. I currently have my DJ booked, should be booking my caterer by the end of the week and am overwhelmed at trying to find a photographer. Some of the details are fun, but the whole money talk thing is not fun. I really need to get a second job, but really haven't found the time. This weekend we are flying out of town for a wedding in Baltimore. Hopefully, when we get back I can start really trying to find something. If only I could hook up with a tutoring company, that would be ideal. At least for the meantime I have been subbing since the second day of school and have kept busy for the most part. We found out a couple weeks ago that we will be staying in San Diego for the next three years so I'm hoping I will be able to get a classroom of my own and clear my credential before we have to move away. Umm, I think that is all for now, I will try to update more even though I'm not even sure anyone follows this!

Break time

Well, I am official finished with my long term sub job with third graders! It was a crazy last week and I am so glad it is over. Last weekend we went up to Nor Cal for the holiday weekend and went to visit venues and have an Engagement BBQ. We did settle on a venue that is a beautiful place less than five miles from my parents house. We will be getting married May 22 next year so now all the planning begins. I had a great time at the BBQ catching up with old friends and visiting with everyone. I have a feeling it is going to be what my wedding will be like since I barely got a chance to eat food. The dogs had a great time running around while we were up there and Maple even stole a chicken leg from my uncle's hand. Bad Dog! Don't worry though, I did pry it out of her mouth before she could eat it since those are very bad for dogs.
Now that I am finished for now with school, it is on to finding some work and working on organizing the house since we have so much stuff! At least I get a break for now since we will be going back to New York in a couple weeks for a wedding!

Unbelievable

So, I had to change the name of the blog since I am a fiance now as Adam reminds me. So I've discovered that 1) It is very challenging to plan a wedding in a town that you are not living in and 2) I am going to be an insane bride! I want things the way I want them and I really don't care to comprise. It's going to be our day so I think things should be the way I want them even though I wish we could just elope! For now I am just trying to get the venue nailed down so that way we can have a date settled on. We are hoping for the 15th of May next year since it would be the day before our four year anniversary but it really depends on the venue that we like. Things are so complicated that it is a wonder that people constantly go through this. I have already felt like researching things is kind of like doing homework so of course I procrastinate lol! I'm glad that I'm not taking a class right now or nothing would get done. I do have to say that it is cute how my third graders have acted. At first they wanted to know who was going to be their teacher once I went to get married. I told them that I wouldn't be getting married until next year so they had nothing to worry about. They all also want to be invited to the wedding although I won't know them at that time and it will be in northern California. It is kinda cute though how much they want to come! I have three weeks left with them and then I will be job hunting again since I won't be subbing until September. Hopefully I find something that I like to do! Well that is all for now!

Craziness!!!

Well it has been awhile since I have updated. Adam got home the morning of May 16th which was our three-year anniversary so it was perfect. We went out to dinner that night and just spent a great time together. It seems like everything has fallen into place since he got home which is nice since I have been working a lot as a long term sub. Two weeks ago Adam proposed, he took me on a hike and proposed at the top of a mountain! It was so cute because he was so nervous even though he knew I would say yes. So now we have a wedding to plan on top of everything else. I'm sure everything will be just fine in the end. I'm looking forward to a honeymoon on white sandy beaches more than the wedding itself! So now I have teaching, planning our wedding as well as attending several weddings in the next year to look forward to. This has been the first weekend that we have been able to relax since Adam got home and that has been nice. The best part is enjoying each others company!

Soon!

Adam is coming home in 15 days!!!! We found out earlier this week that he gets to come home a week early! I'm so nervous and feel like I have so much to do in order to make his homecoming perfect. Also, he will be home two days before our 3year anniversary which he was going to have to miss so I'm very happy about that. I can't wait to go to Joe's which is the restaurant where we had our first date and then walk along the beach to the spot where we had our first kiss. Last year we were on our spot as the sunset and it was so beautiful. I can't wait to be with him and have my best friend back! Anyways, that is all for now since I need to go give the dogs some much needed baths!

Getting There

Around 33 days and Adam will be home finally!!! I wish I could speed up time and make him come home now! I just got back to San Diego on Tuesday after going home for ten days for spring break. The dogs and I had a great time visiting with family and playing on my parents property! It's nice to be back home where I don't have to worry about taking the dogs out since we have a doggie door. However, I do miss the company of my family and now find myself a bit lonely just hanging out with the dogs as always. I miss my best friend and I miss date night! I can't wait until Adam and I can cook dinner together again and just hang out with one another. It's hard to believe that this frustrating time period is almost over. It should be interesting to see how the dogs like Adam coming back into their lives, especially with Buster since he seems to think that he is the man of the house. Anyways, nothing else very exciting to report....

Thankful

I am so glad we finally have less then two months left apart. It's like I've been in a long distance race and I can finally see the finish line. Time does seem to be dragging when I do wish it would speed up and bring Adam home! Less than two weeks of school left than there is spring break. I'm planning to go home and have some much needed family time for a lil over a week. I'm hoping I can pick up some jobs the second half of April since some of the traditional schools will be back in session. When schools go back in May I will be taking over a 3rd grade class for the rest of the year (three months). I'm a bit nervous and excited at the same time. Adam is coming home at the best time, I will need his support the most since I will have a lot to do for the class and then of course there are the crazy dogs. I've been having a difficult time with Buster since he's at least 85 pounds and I just don't know what to do anymore. He's extremely protective of me and thinks everyone else is a threat so I'm hoping that Adam coming home will make him realize it's ok to be a dog and not a constant protector. I learned my lesson and will never have two dogs around the same age again! They just feed off of each other and it is such a challenge to get them under control! I am so glad Adam will be home soon to share all this craziness! I just don't think I would keep my sanity much longer if he weren't coming home soon!

Tired

Adam and I have a little over two months until he comes home and I just can't wait! I've been having dog issues yet again and at times I find them a little overwhelming. I can't wait to have my best friend here to help me. I'm so excited to finally be able to spend a summer with Adam since we haven't had one together since we first met. I will be working up until July but will hopefully have time on the weekends for outings. The month of August will be wonderful since we get to spend it together and will be going back east for one of Adam's cousins weddings. I am so excited that we are so close to being together again but I wish I could speed up time. I will be happy to get through the month of March since April will be slow and of course there is spring break which I am planning to travel home to visit my family. May will bring Adam as well as the challenge of a 3rd grade class that I will be subbing for until the end of July. Right now I feel like I am just trying to get through and hang on. I miss Adam and our closeness terribly but am happy that we are almost through with this misery...

Sunshine Through The Clouds

So, the house is getting better. All the moldy carpet has been ripped out but has not been replaced yet so I cannot use that room and it echos and awful lot. Today was a good day! The 5th graders I had were fun to be with which made the day great! At the gym we took measurements and found out how many inches and where I lost them yay! I also got lovely flowers from my wonderful boyfriend which made me feel oh so loved! Today, Adam also found out he got the billet for survival training instructor here in San Diego. So this means we will be here for three more years at least which is good for both of our careers. We have 79 days left of deployment and I can't wait until Adam comes home. We are going to move to a nicer house, one we can hopefully stay in for the next three years. Anyways I just wanted to share my happy mood since they seem to be far and in between all the bad days! Yay for good days!!!

Challenges

Sometimes I just want to quit. I want to pack up the dogs and just leave. I hate the house that I live in, it has had so many problems since we moved in that I am ready for a change. Too bad that change won't be happening until this fall. The room in the back of the house has had flooding problems during this wet season and the carpet cleaner is coming today. I have been moving out all the furniture and after I moved a bookcase, found that there is a mushroom growing in my carpet. Also, the bookcase that I moved had mold growing on the bottom of it. The house is in complete disarray right now and part of me just wants to leave it like this and not deal with it. The other part of me is screaming for order and everything in its place. These are the times when I think life would be so much easier if Adam were here. He would be helping with all the heavy moving and would know just what to do. I'm trying to hang on, less than three months until he gets home. I just have to keep my eye on the goal. I wish I could speed up time and just make this hardship come to an end. I miss him so badly sometimes I just don't know what to do. I think just getting the house and all our stuff organized will help, we have way to much stuff. When we move we need to purge and just get rid of stuff. The dogs have helped lately by destroying my cherished stuffed animals. Oh well....

Happiness

Today is Adam's 25th birthday and it is sad that we cannot be together for it. I sent off his present last week and am hoping that he gets it soon. We are also passed our halfway point so yay!!! I cannot wait for him to get back, and we are getting so close, only 103 days to go! Maybe even less, depends on things of course with the military. Hopefully this week we will get to see orders that will be available. I'm not sure if we are going to chose right now or not because I am going to try to find a teaching job down here for next year. Adam has made me so happy lately, we've been talking about getting married a lot and he's even come up with how he wants to propose even though he won't tell me. We are hoping that maybe this fall will work for us and we can be married then. Should be interesting if I end up teaching in my first classroom as well as planning a wedding but we shall see. The anticipation for Adam coming home is starting to build, I just hope I can keep my patience. Well that is all for now since Adam is telling me that it is late and I must go to sleep!

Hard

So we are about two days away from our halfway point in this deployment, finally! Tonight is one of those nights where I miss Adam from deep down inside, I just feel sadness deep down. I've been sick this week, which is no fun when you're a substitute and I want is one of his hugs. I think I just get sad sometimes. I wish that some of my good friends were down here. I don't feel like I have anyone to turn to down here. The people I see the most of are my dog park friends, sad huh? I know that everything will be alright as soon as Adam is back home for good, it's just getting there and keeping my sanity that is the difficult part.
I have been keeping busy with substituting though. It seem like ever since the year round schools have gone back from winter break, I have been constantly booked up. Yesterday I had kindergarten, which I normally don't like to sub for since it can be challenging. I had a little girl pee on the carpet while we were sitting doing math. I didn't even notice until another child pointed it out to me and then I figured out who was sitting there. The little girl didn't even tell me, I asked her why and she just stared at me blankly. The thing I do really like about kinder, is the singing songs and playing around, it is not as serious as all the other grades and the kids are so excited about school! Well that is all for now, I think it is time to watch Top Gun and wish my girls were here to watch it with me...

Emotions

Being a military girlfriend is all about keeping your emotions in check. Since Adam has been gone I am constantly making sure that I appear as a strong female and act like I can handle anything that comes my way. Tonight I went to an engagement party of some friends of ours who started dated a couple months after we did. I am so happy for them and had a great time at their party. On the way home however (I shouldn't of driven I realize that now but what else was I to do) Alcohol and everything made me realize how much I miss Adam and how deeply it saddens me. I cried all the way home and for awhile once I got there. It is easy to put up a wall for everyone to make them believe that everything is just fine, but once that way breaks it is like a flood of emotions going on. I miss him so much. I miss sharing my life with him, having conversations, even just holding his hand. I would give anything to have him here with me right now so we could continue our life together. For the moment it feels like everything is on hold and I am just standing here waiting. I don't know what else to do.
There is a chance that Adam might deploy again this year, the thought makes my heart want to die. He would be home for about a month and then would have to leave again. I hate the military. If that ends up happening Adam and I will end up being apart for a year and half give or take a couple months. The thought makes me want to die with sadness. How much is a person supposed to be albe to handle? I like to think that I am a strong person but even I have a breaking point. Well those are my drunken rants tonight. Thank you and I must go cry myself to sleep.

Updates

So it has been a little while since I have blogged. I guess I am just a procrastinator even with this! The holidays were hard to get through without Adam and I am so glad that they are over! Right now we are looking at different orders that Adam can get a hold of and will hopefully know where we are going (if we are going anywhere) by the 6th of February which is two days before Adam's birthday. I've had a nice break from substituting but am ready to go back just because I really need a paycheck to come. Things haven't been that busy since the year round schools have not gone back but hopefully it will pick up this week. Buster and I started obedience school two weeks ago and it seems to be going pretty well. He's also been doing well at the dog park with his shock collar on. We did have an incident at the beach this last Saturday but now that i know what sparks his aggressiveness I will be able to watch for it. I am getting a roommate later on this week to help out with finances. Things should work out ok, and it is only temporary. I just hope the dogs don't become too annoying since they seem to want to bark at everything for some reason now.